LESSONS TO TAKE FROM FAILED RELATIONSHIPS

Breakups are bad. We agonize and overanalyze everything. Today, Orange County elite matchmaking experts from Orange County Singles Dating Service will show you the valuable lessons you can gain from a breakup.

Relationships fail all the time, and that is just a part of life, but just because your relationship failed does not mean you’re a failure. Your failed relationships should not be viewed as a waste of time. No matter how bad your relationship was, there is always something good you can take from it. Instead of overthinking and getting more frustrated, our Orange County elite matchmaking experts want you to look at it from another perspective and you’ll see there is a lot of wisdom to be gained.

Here, our Orange County elite matchmaking experts will review the top lessons you should be taking away from your failed relationships and dating experiences.

1. My Time Is Very Important

When we are in a relationship, we want to spend all of our time with our partner; however, just because you’re in a relationship does not mean you need to be glued to them 24/7.

You should put aside time to spend by yourself, time to cultivate the things you enjoy and pursue your dreams so that you get to keep your identity while giving your partner the chance to do the same thing in their spare time. And the next time you spend time with them, you’ll have a lot of things to share with one another and contribute to the relationship.

2. Create Realistic Expectations

Do not expect anything from your partner that you’re not willing to do for them. For instance, if you always expect them to be on time, then you should never arrive late. Make sure your expectations are communicated directly to them to avoid any arguments. You should treat your partner the way you want to be treated.

3. Learn to Compromise

Relationships are not easy, and they do require a lot of work from both partners. In order to have a happy relationship, both of you need to sacrifice a few things here and there. Both sides must be heard, and the keyword here is BOTH. You need to remember that just one person cannot make all the efforts. You have to work together as a team in order to keep your relationship alive and healthy.

4. Accept Your Partner for Who They Are

Don’t ever try to change your partner. If you discover that they have a bad habit which could have a bad impact on your relationship, then you need to talk to them about it. Don’t ever keep things to yourself if something is bothering you. If you’re able to reach an agreement, perfect. If not, you need to respect their decision and figure out where to go from there.

You can help your partner change for the better if you start creating a good example for them. Let your actions influence then, but until then, let them be themselves.

5. Listen to Your Gut Instincts

Most of the time, there is no reason behind some of the feelings we feel, but if you start digging deep and start feeling like something is wrong, then it probably is. Our Orange County elite matchmaking experts encourage you not to ignore that little voice inside of you. Even if it doesn’t make sense, you should listen to it and follow what it tells you to do.

6. Don’t Cheat

This is pretty much self-explanatory. It is a painful thing to subject your partner to and isn’t acceptable for anyone.

7. Not Worrying about What Others Have to Say

No matter what you do, or don’t do, people around you will always have something to say about it. It does help to listen to their opinions, but you should only follow their advice if it seems to be helping you. Forget anything that does not benefit your relationship.

8. Know When It’s Time to Let Go

Letting go is one of the hardest things a person has to do. When we have been in a relationship for some time, there’s the possibility that we’ll do everything we can to save that relationship.

However, you must come to terms and accept that sometimes things run their course, and we can keep people in our hearts but not in our lives. So if you think you’re giving it your all and the relationship is still not working out, then it’s time to let it go. Let go of that relationship that is hurting you, and even though it’s going to hurt you in the beginning, it’s the best thing you can do for yourself for the future.

9. Infatuation Doesn’t Make a Relationship

There is a big difference between loving someone and feeling lust. Many relationships fail because the initial infatuation fades away, leaving nothing to tie the two partners together. If there is something you can learn from your failed relationship, it’s that it takes real love to keep it together and that those butterflies you feel in the early stages of the relationship will eventually fade away.

10. Forgive Them & Yourself

Regardless of who ended the relationship, our Orange County elite matchmaking experts know two things are for sure: you are both going to be hurt in the process and will both be accountable for the outcome of the relationship.

Don’t ever start blaming your partner, and don’t beat yourself up for the failure. Remember that sometimes good things fall apart so better things can come together… And maybe your relationship was one of those things.

11. Don’t Take Anything for Granted

Through failed relationships, you can learn to be grateful for all the things you have. All too often, people take things for granted and fail to put in the necessary work. This is a painful lesson to learn, but one you won’t commit again.

A failed relationship can make you better, brighter, and wiser. You need to take these valuable lessons away from it and apply them to your future dating experiences.

What lessons have you learned from your failed relationships that have made you a better person today? We encourage you to share your thoughts on our Facebook page.

If you’re not meeting the right partners on your own, contact our matchmakers today by filling out the simple form on our website. We’re eager to hear from you!